April, 16th 2023
Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe — The Incredulity of Saint Thomas by Caravaggio
In times of difficulties and obstacles is hard to believe, our God is always beside us. Saint Thomas was the one who did not believe at the first time about our God's resurrection. After God appeared, he watched it himself, and God said,
“Put your finger here and see my hands, and bring your hand and put it into my side, and do not be unbelieving, but believe.”
Jesus said to him, “Have you come to believe because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and have believed.”
— John 20: 27,29
After that moment, Saint Thomas spent his entries life proclaiming the word of the Lord's resurrection and being evangelized.
On the second Sunday of Easter, the Lord reminds us about how were our 40 days of abstinence and fasting. We are finally marked by the Resurrection of Jesus.
Believing in resurrection brings a lot of indecision at first. It is somehow for me like believing in life's success. No success without difficulties and obstacles; and even after we have passed those difficulties and obstacles and finally being a successful human, gaining money, fame, popularity, and power, and everything! As a human, I will say, I will never get it enough, maybe, it might feel, empty — it is like something is missing. I called it there is no peace inside me.
Peace is an internal issue. We can do things with peace because God is with us. Gaining success, money, power, and all the things the world can give will never bring peace, because there are temporary and will vanish. It won’t bring peace to us. How do I find peace?
First, believe. Find peace by believing in God’s plan: pray and try to get close to God through prayer, meditation, and reading His word through Bible.
In this time, after suffering together with Lord in easter time until His resurrection comes. The Lord wants us to believe in Him in every situation we faced and how we as humans still believe in everything He said to us, making us believe in His master plan for our life.
I often tend to believe in something when I have already seen, touched, or heard, by myself and not easily believe something I didn’t experience myself. I think that’s human nature. Just like Thomas.
But then, I remember the first human who eats the forbidden fruits. They don’t believe in God’s command. In this context, human often tends to not believe things until they experienced themselves.
I wish I do not repeat the same mistake as Adam and Eve, and I could believe in God’s master plan without doubt and delightedly do His will. Even when times are tough.
“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” — Philippians 4:13
“The Lord is my strength and my defense; he has become my salvation. He is my God, and I will praise him, my father’s God, and I will exalt him.” — Exodus 15:2
Inspiration from: Father Rambang Ngawan, OP — on the second Sunday of Easter at Saint John Paul II Chapel, Pakuwon Mall, Surabaya, Indonesia
